How have we used our 100 words this week?

charlie diary entry 100 wc week 6

When I was defending myself from enemy fire, I got shot in both of eyes. Slowly i lost my vision then…suddenly I was able to see again. Scarily i was in a temple getting roasted on a giant stick. Slowly i thought I was going to die then somehow the nerd jumped through the window and untied me. So we killed every person in that temple then the giant fat elephant rat came back so we slashed its head of then it turned into a rat so we did the same and it died. what a day goodbye diary.

Posted by on October 7th, 2014 at 1:33 pm and tagged  | Comments & Trackbacks (2)

2 Responses to “charlie diary entry 100 wc week 6”

  1.   Mr Addison Says:

    This started so well, then with the nerd and the elephant rat it got a bit lost. I wonder if you could have carried on with that? What do you mean by the nerd jumped in? You need to add description.

    Next week, continue the great start!

  2.   Helen Whittaker (team 100WC) Says:

    You used some interesting vocabulary Charlie and your punctuation was good. Don’t forget to always use a capital I when you use it as a pronoun.
    I think you tried to make your story very exciting but you only had 100 words for the 100WC and it can be hard to get everything you want included. I think that’s why your story could be confusing. Try to remember not to try to put too much into the 100WC and save the longer ideas for when you write longer stories

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