How have we used our 100 words this week?

Oliver week 18 100 wc

What was that I could feel? It was a tingling up my spine, a strange feeling in my gut.The more I thought about it, the more terrified I became. If It could touch me, If I could feel it, then it was alive. I didn’t dare turn around. Fearful, terrified but intrigued I slowly risked it ; there was nothing but the thin freezing air that crashed against my confused face. In a split second a huge BANG, a deafening one  filled my ears. I was now knocked out cold.Where was I going to awaken? I will never know.

Posted by on January 19th, 2015 at 2:33 pm and tagged  | Comments & Trackbacks (1)




One Response to “Oliver week 18 100 wc”

  1.   Helen Whittaker (team 100WC) Says:

    A super 100WC this week Oliver. I liked the way you started with a question and used the prompt at the beginning. You’ve punctuated well and used some adventurous vocabulary. I particularly liked ‘terrified but intrigued I slowly risked it’ I don’t think you need the word fearful here as it is only another way of saying terrified.
    When you are writing to build suspense you can use short sentences. Sometimes this works better than using commas.
    Keep up the writing Oliver.

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