How have we used our 100 words this week?

Week 19 Stanley

Once upon a time in a land far away lived a boy called George. Who was killed in 1986, even today policeman are curious to know who the killer was and if he was still alive. One day a normal girl named Claire was walking down the street, to go and buy some bread for her mum to make sandwiches for school, when suddenly… She came across a bump in the ground? She tripped up and grazed her knee, she immediately phoned the police, about 5 minutes later the police turned up and started investigating the bump. In the end they had no choice but to dig it up, but when they dug it up… They found a dead body with a note that read out “ Zeus was here.” With blood dripping rapidly across the body, the police wiped the blood off of the letter and scanned it and found the culprit. They drove round to Zeus’s deadly house and give him a criminal record and imprisoned him for life, they also rewarded Claire with a golden plaque with her name on it, whilst Zeus was in torture for life, or could he escape? How will he? If he does.

Posted by on January 27th, 2015 at 2:23 pm and tagged  | Comments & Trackbacks (9)

9 Responses to “Week 19 Stanley”

  1.   Tom Smith Says:

    Stanley, I really like this story. You really intrigue the reader.

    Well done and keep up the good work.

    Tom Smith (Team 100WC)

  2.   Helen Whittaker (team 100WC) Says:

    Hello Stanley, I think you had some good ideas for your 100WC this week. Also you’ve used a lot of description and mainly punctuated well. You do need to check back over your punctuation as I think ‘who was killed in 1986’ describes George and should be part of the same sentence. I wasn’t sure what happened to George. Was the body meant to be George?
    I thought it was a good idea to leave your 100WC as a cliff hanger, as you never know when a 100WC prompt might allow you to continue the story. One point is that you need to check your story length. I expect you wanted to include all the vivid description but this week’s writing is 200 words long.

  3.   Team 100 Canada Says:

    Stanley, you have written a very intriguing story! I like how you have used the ending to set up the reader for more adventures!
    Well done!

  4.   logan billy Says:

    it was so funny i laught so much

  5.   Patrick Ruairí Says:

    Great story!

  6.   Cathal Ken Says:

    i really liked your story!

  7.   anthonyjamie Says:

    good story

  8.   Fiona (Team 100WC) Says:

    Hi Stanley,
    You have tried to fit a lot into this 100WC, resulting in it being over the word limit, but your story telling is good and you held my interest all the way through. I quite liked that you end the story with a conclusion, but the1n add a twist to leave the reader wondering if Zeus will carry on his reign of terror in the future. Keep up the good work.
    Fiona (Team 100WC)

  9.   Niamh Team 100 Says:

    Dear Stanley,
    This is a very good piece, well done. It is very original. I hope that Claire is safe in the future!
    Keep up the good work.
    Niamh Team 100 Ireland

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